What You Learn as a Therapist’s Assistant

I'm not a therapist. 
I'm not even close.

I had no job ambitions or prospects involving the mental health sphere, my time spent in college was all arts based. I have, at most, done 2 years of therapy in my life that was very sporadic (but helpful!) and absolutely none of it was relationship based.

This is to preface that I, upon starting this job, had no idea what to expect. Would I have a preachy boss who finds a way to make anything an emotional intelligence lesson? Blood thirsty therapists who go mask-off the second they finish a session? Nonstop relationship tips I would overbearingly bring forth to my partner?

What I’ve gotten out of this job was both mundane and more interesting than I could have ever hoped for.

Therapists are people too, that’s just how good their training is.

I remembered during therapy how aware and strict my therapist was with personal boundaries. I didn’t know anything about her. Originally, I attributed it to being someone who was guarded and professional, but not very authentic or warm. Now that I work around therapists I know how hard they work to be welcoming, nonjudgmental, nurturing. They have kids, car payments, hobbies, very rich inner lives that you may not explicitly know about because they are not self-disclosing. However, you can rest assured they are dealing with a lot of the same life challenges that most of us do. They are just not like your friends who hear your story partially and insert their own experiences into it.

It actually does matter who you see.

Therapists all have different pathways that lead to the same place. Everyone’s unique experience paints the methods of their practice. Things like cultural backgrounds, gender, sexuality, disability, preferred modalities, all make your therapist just as nuanced as you are! No two are the same. Although some may have overlap, I have seen first hand how each person’s life directly shapes the way they conduct therapy in and out of session.

No, they don’t talk shit about you.

I ALWAYS wondered this. In my earlier years I felt that I wasn’t being vulnerable with what I actually needed to work on, opting instead to tell a good story and say that was my therapy. I tried to keep my updates exciting, my introspection weighty, something that would be “worth it” to my therapist. However, now that I have wizened up I realize that those moments were misdirected at best and a waste of time at worst. 
Your therapist cares for your well being.
That means protecting you and your life from outsiders INCLUDING other professionals.

Working with a team of emotionally aware people is very refreshing.

Who would have thought? I am surrounded by adults who are extremely emotionally aware and capable of handling conflict. This is day and night to some past spaces I have worked in. I should have assumed this would be the case, but it was a very pleasant surprise to learn!

All therapy is relational therapy, duh.

Everyone in your life has a relationship with you.
Really think about it for a second.

The life you lead, and every interaction, establishes a new thread between you and the world around you. We tend to these threads every day. If you are in individual therapy, you are already strengthening your side of any relationship. That is still relational therapy. Your child, your partner, your mailman, your coworker, endless dynamics and understandings forged in your life! Another thread: your therapist. And how they demonstrate their relationship skills with you is just as, if not more, important than what they say.

Turns out the least interesting thing about therapists is also the best thing about them. They're people too.